Fantastical Creatures!

Many years from now I will sit down with a small herd of my grandchildren and pull at my long white beard while I tell them about Japan. There will probably be stories about samurai and geisha, and how Totoro really was my neighbor. This will all be fabricated, of course, but given my present luck with facial hair I imagine my beard will be too. Hopefully the grand-kids will understand. One of the true stories I will tell them will be about my trip to Osaka, which begins thusly:

When I went to Osaka, I kinda stuck out. Firstly, it was hot and sunny so I was sweating buckets like I usually do (I have only ever seen two Japanese people sweat). Also, I had been expecting sudden rain showers because: a. there was a typhoon heading toward the coast, and b. there had been abrupt downpours for the last two days. So I had my umbrella. Of course it was beautifully sunny all day and no one else in sight had an umbrella because they had gotten the memo. Alas. I also had my backpack from college with dragons and koi painted on, which I imagine was unusual. This I didn't mind so much, because my backpack was for carrying loot.

You see, I had come to Osaka with a mission. Something I have wanted to do since I was nine years old. I think this photo explains everything:

The common theme for the day asserted itself right away- it was really crowded in there. This was partly my fault for visiting in the middle of a three-day weekend, but also I think they were holding some kind of event that particular Sunday. I had been hoping for a leisurely browse through the variety of Pokemon merchandise, but instead I was stuck mostly catching glimpses of things as I shuffled past in a crush of people. (I noticed that there were just as many unaccompanied adults as children)

This was a little hard for me because I had never seen so many things Pokemon in one place before. As a kid (when I was more into Pokemon than I am now...I think) I remember feeling lucky when they had just restocked the little Pokemon corner at Target. Then there would be maybe five different kinds of stuffed toy, a few different plastic figurines, and some trading card packs. Anyway, at this store they had hundreds of stuffed toys and figurines. They also had stationary, hats, shirts, snacks, and an assortment of other toys (including a pikachu that dances if you clap for it). The end result was that I had the very real desire to bury myself under the pile of pikachu toys and hide there until the mall closed, only to frolic about once the lights went out.

One of the coolest parts of being there was seeing all the small children who were getting just as excited as I was at their age. Pokemon was created 15 years ago, and it still seems to be going strong.

Anyway, once I had chosen my souvenirs and waited in the 10 minute line to get to the cash register, the cashier told me that I could go enter in the tombola with my receipt because I had made a purchase of a certain amount. I thanked her and stepped aside to put my loot into my backpack before getting my prize. Apparently this would not do- appearing to the world like a lost customer, I found myself beset by a clerk who led me graciously yet forcefully to the prize table. Nodding and repeatedly thanking the clerk for taking such good care of me I was shown by two other clerks how to spin the wheel that would drop a colored ball and thus dictate what kind of prize I won. Exhibiting my finer motor skills I spun the contraption and out dropped...a red ball! “What does that mean?” I asked the smiling diviners of plastic spheres. It meant that I got a sticker. I think this shows just how dedicated Japanese customer service is- the valued customer might only get a sticker, but the staff will be damned if the customer somehow misses that opportunity and thus leaves feeling unfulfilled.

After disentangling myself, my umbrella, and my sticker from the horde of Pokemon fans, I made my way back to the train depot-

-which was very large. My next destination was on a small man-made island in the bay of Osaka, but I'm pleased to say that I got there by generally looking clueless and repeating the name of the station to anyone in uniform. (This involved taking a subway that was, deceptively, three stories above the ground) My destination was Osaka's famous aquarium “Kaiyukan,” but like the Pokemon center I was not the only one who had that plan in mind.

(There was an amusement park next-door with a ferris wheel, it looked equally popular.)

Once inside, I began to snap as many photos as I could, but this was difficult with so many people jockeying for position at the exhibit windows. So I ended up with many blurry photos with better pictures of the other people than the animals-

(Jellyfish and man's pointer finger)

(Spotted seal and striped woman)

(Capybara and Docomo cellphone)

(Eagle Ray and Toddler)

Eventually I gave up and started intentionally taking photos of my co-visitors-

(This shirt says “The decoration given to the pure thing which has a heart strongly so that it may be fine in the sky tomorrow I wrap all the young men looking for something.” This gives you a vague idea of what I correct in my students papers.)

I finally stopped trying to take pictures, realizing that I would become very crabby if I continued.

(Okay, this is actually a shed lobster carapace, but close enough.)

So I did my best to take everything in with my eyes instead of my camera, and I started to really enjoy myself. One of the better exhibits had seals and sea lions inside, one of whom was trying to sleep while its offspring climbed all over it. The capybaras were also pretty fun- a sign titled “secrets of capybaras” extolled “lets pay attention to their bodies!” And when I was done being a capybara voyeur I got to see what I had come to the aquarium for.

The Kaiyukan is famous for having a whale shark, and they capitalize on this in a big way given that their icon is a whale shark among other things. This particular shark was named Yu-chan, which amused me because “chan” is usually a suffix given to someone who is small and cute. I watched her swim around her tank a few times and was surprised at two things; one, that she seemed so small, and two, that she had a badly injured fin. At the time I got a little cross at the aquarium, thinking that they had mistreated her, but later I did some research and found that the Kaiyukan gets most of its whale sharks through rescue operations. Yu-chan had gotten tangled in a fishing net before she was rescued by the aquarium's research team and moved to a special facility. I'm assuming she sustained the scarred pectoral fin during that fishing accident. Second, I found out that Yu-chan is small because she's only five or so years old. Whale sharks reach sexual maturity at age 25 or so, so the whale shark I saw was very literally a baby. The aquarium knows that it has limited space, so it keeps only young sharks and then releases them while the animal is still of a manageable size. So far there have been around 10 different whale sharks that the aquarium has saved, displayed, and released.

So yeah, I was pretty taken with her. And because the glass windows were large enough I took a few pictures of her over people's heads...

...but then the other fish got in the way...

...and she blurred.

So finally I just asked politely and the aquarium staff took her out of the tank so we could get a nice photo together.

Before I left the aquarium and my new-found shark-crush, I had some octopus balls for dinner.

On my way back to the train station I tried to take a photo of the local pachinko parlor, but it was getting too dark. It says “It is strong in time, and it is gently to time tough at time.”

And that, grand-kids, is how your grandfather went to Osaka Japan.

-Andrew